The Art of Forgiveness

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Blog posting by Erick Pettersen of People Connect

Currently, I am working on a novel I call a psychological-memoir. The storyline will be that of a psychological thriller; however, it will carry elements of my life. The theme will be that of personal and social forgiveness, rather than being a religious theme.

The idea came to me after I heard someone say that sometimes what holds us back from achieving our full potential is the bitterness we hold onto. We allow that bitterness to grow inside of us and pervade our lives. After a while, we grow accustomed to the bitterness, and it begins to affect those around us.

In my book, the protagonist (Michael) goes back to ask for forgiveness from someone from his past. He comes to believe he can only overcome the guilt that plagues his life by seeking out the person he offended and asking for her forgiveness. At the same time, Rebecca, who has come to live with the effects of this heinous sin committed against her, goes on her own journey to try to erase the memories of her past. The story is about each person’s search for forgiveness, whether we need to ask for forgiveness from someone or we need to forgive.

Forgiveness is an issue I believe we all need to deal with at one level or another, whether with another person or people group. It is an issue that holds many of us back from becoming the best we can be, connecting with those around us, and achieving our dreams. Today, if you want to connect with someone, in your personal or professional life, but you just can’t seem to, consider that maybe un-forgiveness keeps you from making those connections.

One last thought. Forgiveness does not require forgetfulness; it only asks you to let go and move forward into a better you.

Keep connecting,

Erick

Seeing Needs

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Blog posting by Erick Pettersen of People Connect

For those of us who grew up with cartoons like G.I Joe and Duck Tales, we forever have mantras such as “And knowing is half the battle!” and “Work smarter, not harderer!” stuck in our heads. By now, many of you know that I am the guy who runs SEOBridges.com, and I have connected with many of you via Facebook or Twitter. A week after I launched my site, I am on the top of Google’s list, but I need to keep gaining knowledge in order to stay there.

Right now, I am gathering addresses of potential clients here in the San Diego area. After I gather all 560 or so of those address, I will research several of those companies. It doesn’t make sense to research an entire population, when a sample will do the job. Then, I will provide services to meet the needs of those companies. After that, I will send out letters of introduction to those companies. Yes, actual letters.

It’s important to slow down and take the time to development relationships with people. I have come to understand that people care what you know, as well as who you know, but they also care that you know their needs.

When I get ready to send out those letters of introduction, I will take the time, as best I can, to find out those companies’ needs. Running a business is about developing relationships, seeing needs, and letting your clients know you care about their well being.

Until next week,

Erick

Qualities of Leadership

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Blog posting by Erick Pettersen of People Connect.

This last weekend, a national audience viewed a great example of how not to connect.  At the end one of the greatest upsets in sports history, the leader of that team left the game without shaking the hands of the players on the other team.  The day after that event, that player faced accusations of his unsportsmanlike like conduct, excused his behavior rather than accepting responsibility.  In the same way that a player or coach walking off of a court without shaking the hands of their opponents shows something about their character, any business person who does not conduct him/herself in a team like manner reveals something about their character.

I played high school baseball, and my coach told us that we practice like we play.   Everyday we dressed in full uniform and practiced like we played.  Over a three year period (I transferred my sr. yr.) we went 29-1 during the regular seasons.  I believe ‘presentation is everything,’ and I surround myself with people who also follow that principle.

It is important that you practice like you play; though, it’s just important that you surround yourself with others who also practice like they play.  First, always dress in full uniform.  Everyday, I wake at 5, take a shower, get dressed, grab a cup of coffee, and read.  Everyday, I make sure I’m working in a clean room with a made bed.  I work at home, and my clients don’t care what I or my room looks like.  They only care that I get the job done.  The environment we create for ourselves begins at home.

Whether you are self-employed, an employer, or a co-worker, the people on your team are part of your environment just as much as your daily routine.  The clients you attract is evidenced by the team you create, and the team you create is evidenced by how you conduct yourself in all situations.   

Since that sports upset this past weekend, Sports analyst have begun to question the future of that one player and that team.  I suspect that like other teams that have experienced major upsets, how that one player conducts himself in the months and years to come will determine the future of that organization.  In the same way, if you are a leader of any type of organization,  how you conduct yourself in all circumstances will determine the future of your organization.

 

Until next week, Keep connecting.  And come join the growing list of people on People Connect and AgentsPayingForward.

 

Erick

 

Connecting Through Our Word

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Blog posting from Erick Pettersen from People Connect

Good morning,

So, it’s Thursday, and usually I post these on Tuesdays.  A friend once told me an apology comes without ‘ifs, ands, or buts,’ so I apologize for the two day delay of this blog. 

Yesterday, I had such  an awesome customer service experience that I wanted to share it with you.  Several months ago, I bought a pair of jeans at Eddie Bauer.  Last week, the back of one of the knees came out of the dryer shredded.  Eddie Bauer stands behind all of their products with a 100% no excuses guarantee, so I decide to try that guarantee out.

Last night, I walked into a local Eddie Bauer.  When the sales lady greeted me, I held up the pants and told her the story.  She looked at the tears, asked me if I wanted to look for another pair.  After I said yes, she said she would hold the ripped pair behind the counter.

A few minutes later, after I found my size, and tried them on, just to be on the extra safe side, I brought them to the front counter.  The guy behind the counter asked me if I had a receipt.  Thinking that my lack of a receipt would get me something like a $25 store credit, which would leave me with a bill of $25 or more, I admitted to my lack of a receipt.  He said ‘no problem,’ continued on with the transaction, asked me if I wanted a bag (As a Green travel writer, my conscious and my mouth said no), then handed me a receipt.  I thanked him and walked out of the store with a brand new pair of Eddie Bauer jeans no questions asked.

Few people know the history of Eddie Bauer.  Few people know that he was the first person to use Down in jackets, which he provided to our soldiers in World War II.  Few people know the story of the guy who brought a tennis racket (When Eddie made tennis rackets) back to him, said it got ruined, and Eddie restrung the racket in spite of examining it and determining that the racket got ruined in the rain. 

One thing everybody who buys Eddie Bauer merchandise knows is that years after Eddie Bauer’s death his legacy lives on.  Eddie Bauer made a name for himself by standing behind his products, an he demonstrated that by naming his store Eddie Bauer.  Yesterday, they earned themselves another life long customer.

If you want to connect with people, be a man or woman of your word.  Among many others, one of my mottos is, “If I can’t be anything else, I can be a man of my word.”  I created the concept of People Connect because I want to connect with people who realize if they can’t be anything else, they can be men or women of their word.  Today, I encourage you to connect, but I encourage you to connect by standing behind whatever service or product you offer.

As a nation, we have come to a place of absolute desperation, because we don’t know whom to trust anymore.  And we don’t know who to trust because we’ve become a nation of isolationists who stand within the shadows rather than by our word.  If we’re going to get out of this economic slump, if we’re going to learn to trust our teammates, we need to connect with each other.  That means we need to hold each other accountable, and we need to be men and women of our word.

 

Until next week, keep connecting.

 

 

Erick

Your Anchor

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Blog posting from Erick Pettersen from People Connect

Family is awesome. Okay, my family is awesome. My 16 year old Nephew just walked into my room to use my bathroom, so he can head off to his first day at the local high school. Across the hall from me, my brother and sister-in-law, who flew to California from Minnesota with their family, sleep off another long day of keeping up with their four kids and one granddaughter. Over the weekend, my household went from three to 15, which happens every few years. Sometimes it gets up to about twenty, but my sister Kristina went to Cancun. Since neither of her daughter’s drives, they can’t come down here. Though, there is not shortage of laughter.

I cherish the summer days that my brother and his family spend with us, because while they do not happen that often, they happen. For several years, my brother Tom and his family never came to California. I don’t know why, but I assume it always came down to money. During those years, if I wanted to see him, I had to fly to Minnesota; and since all of my money went to paying for college, rather than taking leisurely trips, I went for several years without seeing my brother and his family. In fact, his two youngest children reached and passed several of their childhood years before I met either of them. Now, when Tom and his family fly out here, all of my surrounding family from southern California, Arizona, and Nevada takes a week off and joins the festivities.

For an entire week, we play card games, throw each other in the pool, update each other with stories about our life’s happenings, and eat brawts. Yesterday, Tom told me he is thinking about moving out this way, but he said right now the slow economy keeps him in northern Minnesota. Last night, after we finished the dinner my sister-in-law Mary cooked for the family, we celebrated my niece Brittany’s upcoming 15th birthday with Cake (my brother John forgot the ice cream), then five of us sat around the dining room table and shared more stories. After we finished our series of stories, we took our plates to the kitchen, I swiped a finger full of cake frosting onto my finger, wiped the rest of the frosting into the garbage, and set my plate and fork on the counter. Standing behind Tom’s wife Tammy, I reached out my cake frosted finger in front of her, and smeared it on her face. She called me a ‘dork,’ told me to sleep with one eye open, and went to clean her face. Our days of laughter, story telling, watching each other’s children grow into young men and women, and enjoying each other’s company will end.

For now, I enjoy them, because life will change. I tend not to hang around one spot for too long, so a year from now I may be in northern California or in a different state (I doubt it will be that soon). For now I enjoy the incessant noise, one or another of my nieces or nephews walking into my room and using my shower (I don’t even mind that they squeeze the toothpaste from the middle), my great niece looking wide eyed at the big people, and my sister Deb explaining the rules of Rummy 500 to me for the umpteenth time. Life may go on, but opportunities to enjoy today and the people who surround you today will end.

In all of your connections with people throughout your life, keep your family closest. I spent two years in Boston while my family enjoyed each other 3,000 miles away. And while I will always remember and be thankful for my time in Boston, the loneliness of holidays spent alone, birthdays singing ‘happy birthday to me,’ late night subway rides on the orange line hoping I didn’t get mugged, and breaking up potential bar fights between my Laker buddies and Celtic fanatics made me realize that of all of the connections I wanted to make in order to pursue my life goals, none of those connections mattered without family.

At the cost of sounding preachy, I am going to encourage you today to make your first and strongest connections with your family. All of those connections you make throughout your life are like a chain, but your family is the anchor that keeps your ship from drifting too far. You can make all of the connections in the world that will lead to wherever you want to get to, but without that anchor that is your family the ship that is your life will drift out to sea.


I am going to go spend some time with my family. Until next week, keep connecting.

Erick

Quick Tips to Connecting People (Virtually)

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Blog posting from Erick Pettersen from People Connect:

Today, I’m going to write a crash course on my methods to connect people to people by getting people to your web site.  Right now, I am working on multiple projects.  Some of them have a little more steam under them than others.  Those that have steam, I fuel; those that don’t I fuel from the flames of those projects that have steam.

Go to SDgreenlife.com.  If you go to the about section, you will notice a guy who stole my picture and my name writes for that website.  I confess, it’s me.  We’re growing and getting some attention.  If you enter in the words ‘San Diego Green Life’ SDgreenlife is the second result.  Though, I’m sure we’ll go back to No. 1, since the UCSD link is date specific. 

Okay, so our site's listing on Google dramatically changes when you delete the word ‘Green.’  Now, I’m sure you’re thinking, “Erick, marketing isn’t your strong suit.”  Sure it is, and the numbers show.  The other night, I got an e-mail from the publisher, who said my efforts are paying off.  In the first three days of May, we already had 75% of the readership we had throughout the entire month of April. 

The first thing I did was find out who our competitors were.  After that, I did a little keyword research.  SDgreenlife is rich with such keywords as ‘Green,’ ‘Sustainable,’ and other words.  A little more than a month ago I started a Facebook page for SDgreenlife.  This last weekend I accepted our 100^th friend, so to celebrate I started Tweeting.  As of this morning, just 48 hours later, we have 80 followers all over the world.  Okay, so we’re no Ashton Kutcher, but he’s overrated.

When I started the FB page, I decided to focus on finding friends who would be the most interested in our project.  People in San Diego, who take an interest in Green issues.  Now, a little more than a month later, 73 of our 102 friends are here in San Diego.  This last week, I interviewed a couple of people from our Facebook page for articles that you will be able to see in next month’s issue.  I am using our FB page to get San Diegans involved.

Okay, so when I started Twitter, I focused on an exchange of information, rather than Green San Diegans.  For me, Twitter is like a news wire.  Like standing at a virtual water cooler.  Honestly, I neither have the time nor the interest in reading Tweets about the latest Hollywood gossip.  I am using Twitter as a news source, which I can pass on to other Green people.

You’re business relies on developing lasting partnerships, whether you find those relationships through Google, Facebook, your local church, or hiring a skywriter to write ‘Eat at Joes’ over the beach at sunset. 

Of course, this is my method and may not work for every person, or in every situation, but this is the one that works for me.  If you would like to follow SDgreenlife on Twitter or join our Facebook page, we would welcome your friendship.

 

Until next week keep connecting,

Erick

The Friendly and the Friendless

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Blog posting from Erick Pettersen from People Connect:

Last week, a couple of friends of mine from Boston came to my house for dinner.  I reminisced with them about how I befriended their son a few years earlier.

When I moved to the Boston area, from San Diego, I started out in Salem.  One night after work, in down town Boston, I walked to TD Bank Garden North, where the Celtics play and trains depart.  On most nights, large metal partitions hide two escalators that lead from the train station to the Celtics’ stadium.  On game nights, and a few other nights, people ride up and down those escalators.  On that Friday night, after I arrived at the train station, crowds of people streamed up and down those escalators.

I looked at my watch, checked the train schedule, and decided I had time to venture to the top of the escalators.  At the top, I stopped, turned, and asked the first person I saw about the cause of the mysterious crowd.  Three years later, his parents sat on the other side of my dining room table.  For two years, while I lived 3,000 mile from home, my friend and his family made me feel welcome in Boston.

That friendship started with one question that led to an answer that led to a conversation that led to the realization of mutual interests that led to exchanging phone numbers that led to many afternoons of coffee and evenings of meals.  Do you understand how the chain works?  If so, can you explain it to me.  There is no scientific method, there is only trial and error; though, it only works if we’re willing to let go of our preconceived notions and befriend the friendly and the friendless. 

People Connect is about connecting with people, in order to meet common life goals, not about shallow business relationships.  Hey, if more business comes of it, great. If a greener world comes of it, even better.  If a you receive a richer life, due to a great friendship, that’s awesome. 

Perhaps you came to this blog via AgentsPayingForward or a set of keywords you typed into Google.  Maybe you’re a friend of mine on Facebook or you follow me on Twitter.  However you came to this blog, you most likely found it because you want to connect with people who want to connect with people and are striving toward goals beyond themselves.  People Connect is about developing relationships, in order to meet goals. 

When I moved to Boston, I shook the hand of every person willing to shake mine. When I moved back to San Diego, I did the same.  Most of my friends from college had moved on, so I needed to make new friends.  Less than a year later, I continue to shake hands with whomever I can, chat on line with new Facebook friends, try to remember to return notes via my Twitter followers, and know my efforts to connect with people will lead to a goal greater than me.

Ten years ago, someone asked me what I saw myself doing in 10 years.  I answered, “I don’t know what I’ll be doing in 10 years, but I do know this—if it’s not bigger than me, we’ve got a problem.”  Ten years after she gave me an awkward look, followed by silence, and a long, drawn out “Okay,” I am on the right track toward my goal.

Now the question is, are you?  In the wave of technology that causes us to lose more and more of our humanity, relationships become more and more valuable.  Whatever your goal, I encourage you to connect with people, not the potential for money or business leads or other.  I urge you to connect with the friendly and the friendless without expectation.  

If you connect with people like one wave connects with another, you will find your shore.  

I would love to hear from any of my followers, or anyone else reading this blog, about your journeys, how those journeys are going, and the type of relationships your building.

Keep Connecting,

Erick

Five Principles of People Connect

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Blog posting from Erick Pettersen from People Connect:

"Today, I want to talk about how you can begin to connect with like-minded people. Though, before I get too far into that, I want to tell you about my recent work with non-profits.

This last weekend, I went to a launch meeting for a new non-profit in San Diego, which will focus on connecting readers and writers. It’s not a legal 501 C3 yet, but the executive committee is moving in that direction. At the meeting, which brought in a group of about 25 people, the director (Karla Olson) talked about the vision. After she talked, everyone broke off into one of the four preset committees. Of course, I joined the web/marketing committee; and, of course, when the head of the committee asked my specialty, his ears perked at the sound of “SEO Content.” Everyone with a web site needs SEO content.

Within the last four months, I’ve connected with people on the ground floor of two non-profits and one entrepreneurial venture. I also connected with another literary non-profit, called Dime Stories, which is in its early stages and growing. That is what my vision is all about—people connecting with people. So, for the rest of this blog, I want to lay out some steps I believe everyone can take to begin to connect with like minded people.

First, choose your goal. Several years ago, just out high school, I decided to step out of my comfort zone. Since my favorite sport to play was basketball, I found some basketball courts. Though, rather than going to the basketball courts in the uppity neighborhoods, I went to the courts in the barrios. San Diego has no true ghettos, just barrios—Hispanic versions of ghettos.

Many times I was the only white guy, sometimes I was the only guy who couldn’t claim affiliation to a gang, sometimes other guys told me we had to leave because the park became gang territory at night, every time I knew I had earned people’s respect for stepping out of my comfort zone. Before Oprah calls me for an interview, I will set the record straight and say I never ran drugs or anything like that. I don’t want to become known as the James Frey of bloggers. I went to those parks with a goal—to begin to break down walls—to set a precedent

Second, create an environment for yourself that allows you to nourish your goals. That can happen in several ways. For me, I believed in my goals so much that after 3 years of studying philosophy, I completely back tracked, lost way more than 50 credits, changed universities, and changed my major to literature. Along the way, I developed relationships with people; though, I kept my goals in mind. I learned that if I was going to accomplish my goal of graduating from college, I had to surround myself with people who encouraged me toward that goal. Not all of my friends went to, or had any plans to ever go to, college; though, all of them respected that my studies came before going out on a Friday night.

Third, speaking of studies coming before going out on Friday nights, be willing to sacrifice for your goals. If your goal is to start and raise a family, it’s time to hang up your bachelor/bachelorette shoes. If your goal is to make money, spend wisely. And, along with creating an environment that allows you to nourish your goals by developing relationships with people who support your goals, be willing to let go of unhealthy relationships. However you sacrifice, don’t plant daisies in a field of weeds.

Fourth, and this is one I am passing onto you from former New York State and U.S. Poet Laureate Billy Collins, when I asked him about pursuing my literary goals, “Don’t expect it to happen over night . . . Let it move into the center of your life.” My ultimate goal is to connect people to people; to break down social walls. My writing is a means to that goal. Give your goals time to flourish, just as a caterpillar’s goal of becoming a butterfly requires patience.

Fifth, reflect your goal. This goes along with the Law of Attraction. If your goal is to start a business, and you’re just sitting at home and watching television and thinking of great business ideas, you will never meet other people who might like your idea. The Law of Attraction works, because if you create an environment that allows you to nourish your goals, at some point others with similar goals and environments will see your environment and be attracted to your similar goals. Of course, the fastest and best way to find like minded people is to join organizations, such as San Diego Writer’s Ink or GreenPeace.

Those principles are the ones that work best for me. I welcome any questions or comments. Also, I want to start connecting, so tell me about some of your goals. I have begun to connect with people, because I’ve set principles into my life, and I follow those principles. It’s come because I respect people and their ideas, and they respect me and mine." See ConnectingPeopleToABetterTomorrow.blogspot.com

People Connect with Agents Paying Forward

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For this blog, I am going to compare The Women’s History Museum and Educational Center to the Wyatt Earp Museum. The Women’s History Museum and Educational Center continues to thrive, while the Wyatt Earp Museum closed their doors. I believe if those of us who believe in a Pay it forward system connect with each other, we can help more and more museums and non-profit organizations thrive.

The Women’s History Museum and Educational Center focuses on three things: Reputable link partners, such as North County Times and Tinkem Museum of Art; keyword density, such as ‘women,’ ‘history museum,’ and ‘history reclamation project;’ and getting people involved, through community events. Good SEO content drives traffic to their Web site, which leads people to signing up for their e-mail list, which leads to e-mails about events, which leads to more members and more donations.

When I compare the Wyatt Earp Museum to the Women’s History Museum and Educational Center, I notice well written SEO content and reputable link partnerships on the Women’s History Museum and Educational Center Web site that the Wyatt Earp Museum Web site does not focus on. Rather than focusing on a few key words, repeated over and over again, the Wyatt Earp Museum uses various words and terms scattered through their site.

Since the Wyatt Earp Museum Web site does not consist of many pages, it does not give Web spiders and Metacrawlers much to search. For that reason, they would do well to do two things: add more pages with more content, so the Web spiders and Metacrawlers can search through a deeper bed of keywords; and develop better link partnerships, other than Gothere.com and Americanwest.com.

While I hope the Wyatt Earp Museum finds a new home soon, I fear they will not unless they take lessons from organizations like the Women’s History Museum and Educational Center. I fear various non-profit organizations will lose funding, unless they focus on keyword density and developing link partnerships with reputable organizations that will drive users to their Web sites, get people involved in their organizations, and lead to more donations and more funding.

So that is where my vision for People Connect comes in. I would like to develop a team of people, who believe in the potential of these organizations, and organizations just like them throughout the United States. People Connect will consist of reputable professional all over the United States, and perhaps even beyond, who believe in getting things done through a pay it forward model. For those who want to help a favorite non-profit, through a more indirect pay it forward model, Tom Ash, founder of Agents Paying Forward and ACN paying Forward, offers ways for people to continue to do what they love while offering a portion of their earnings to non-profits they designate.

If you want to get involved with People Connect, Agents Paying Forward, and/or ACN Paying Forward, or If you are a museum or other non-profit organization, I encourage you to contact me or Tom Ash. Many of these organizations cannot pay that much money; though, I believe if we develop a pay it forward model, and connect people to people, we will reap the rewards.

Until next week keep connecting,
Erick Pettersen